The Birth: September 28, 2011

4:00 A.M.
I wake up to find out that Ashley had already been having minor contractions since 1 o'clock. I asked her why she didn't wake me up and she said there was no need too, which I then agreed and went back to sleep.

4:49 A.M.
I can't sleep with the nurse continuing to come in and out of the room so I decided to watch some Sportscenter.

5:49 A.M.
Only problem with watching Sportscenter so early in the morning is after one hour there is nothing else to watch. So I tried to go back to sleep.

6:18 A.M.
Can't sleep so I start to work on my blog.

6:42 A.M.
Ashley is now asleep and I am wide awake.

7:24 A.M.
I start taking pictures and video of this experience. Ashley yells and curses at me.

7:35 A.M.
We get our first visit from the doctor and Ashley is already 2 cm dilated! Doctor said at this rate we could meet Kherington by noon! They don't have to give her pitocin to speed up the process because she is doing it all on her own. Kherington can't wait to meet her daddy!

7:36 A.M.
Everyone is receiving mass texts from me letting them know noon is the time for my scheduled landing.

8:02 A.M.
Ashley's contractions are bad. She sounds like a wounded seal.

8:05 A.M.
Ashley is screaming for the epidural even though the doctor told her to wait till she is about 4 cm. But what do doctors know?!

8:32 A.M.
By this time Ashley's body is an ocean of sweat and she is screaming for an epidural like Mel Gibson screamed for his son in Ransom.

8:35 A.M.
I step outside the room to grab the nurse so Ashley can get her epidural shot and from the hallway her room sounds like a scene from Hostel. She sounded like she was being tortured.

8:46 A.M.
While Ashley is laying there screaming and cursing at me, I asked her, "This doesn't mean we aren't going to have another one right?" Wrong question to ask!

9:05 A.M.
Here comes the epidural man to save my day!

9:11 A.M.
Ashley is asleep.

9:20 A.M.
I'm asleep.

10:15 A.M.
My mom is the first person to come visit since we heard our target time of noon.

10:56 A.M.
Ashley is at 9 cm! It is almost time! My facebook and twitter are constantly being updated along with my mass texts being sent out.

11:12 A.M.
Ashley's dad is here now!

11:20 A.M.
Trying to figure out if we will be all set in our room for the St. Louis Cardinals game at 8 o'clock. They have to win to force a one game playoff but if the Atlanta Braves lose and the Cardinals win the Cardinals clinch the NL Wild Card. So Kherington didn't come on a Sunday to interfere with the NFL games but now she might interfere with one of MLB's biggest nights? I can already see that this is a sign from God telling me she will be getting in the way of a lot of sporting events in the future.

11:52 A.M.
We find out that Dr. Hardy has a C-section at 12 o'clock and that he will be in afterwards. The nurse says Ashley is still at 9 cm and she is going to give her some pitocin to help to that last centimeter.

12:10 P.M.
The wounded seal is back.

12:57 P.M.
The wounded seal is still, well... wounded.

1:05 P.M.
The nurses come in and gives us the instructions for when Ashley pushes. How to hold her smelly feet, where to give her leg support, and how to count to ten.

1:26 P.M.
Still pushing. Facebook and twitter getting constantly updated.

1:31 P.M.
Well hello Dr. Hardy!

1:47 P.M.
I can see her head! This is so amazing! Haven't started crying yet!

1:50 P.M.
O-M-G! (Yes, I just used OMG to explain my feelings. I am at an emotional state, give me a break!) This is by far the neatest most awesomest (Yes, awesomest) experience I have ever had!

1:53 P.M.
Her head is out! And tears form.

1:54 P.M.
Little miss Kherington Marie is born, cue the water works. The 10 or so seconds it took for her to start crying was probably the most nerve wrecking experience, and I couldn't even see her because my eyes were blurry. Her stats are 7 lbs. and 19.25 inches.

1:55 P.M.
I cut the umbilical cord which was like taking a pair of kitchen shears and cutting a garden hose. Not as easy as it looks!

1:57 P.M.
Ashley gets to hold the love of her life. I look at Kherington in her eyes and I can see she gave me the, "Move aside I'm number one now!" look. Already this child has her mother's attitude. Unbelievable.

2:01 P.M.
I get to hold my beautiful baby girl. Greatest moment of my life. I finally got to meet her.

2:07 P.M.
Family and friends are allowed to come into the room and share this experience with us. Thank you to all who showed up and thank you to everyone who didn't because that would have been really crowded then.

Tip #42: Watch your child being born. It sounds disgusting and in every video you watch before hand it is disgusting. But when that is your child being born, and you are watching him or her start their life. It is absolutely breath taking.

And this is when my plane landed on my journey to, destination... dad.

The Teams: June 15th, 2011

There will be a huge fight between Ashley and I when Kherington gets older because there is only one sports team that we agree on, and that is the St. Louis Cardinals. In college basketball and the NFL we completely disagree. I of course love every sport, and Ashley loves certain sports, it is one of the reasons we love each other so much. We use sports in our lives all the time. I told Ashley if we were having a boy I was going to paint the room burgundy and gold for the Redskins, and we already decided that our wedding colors are going to be royal blue because that is Duke and Kansas University's colors. We have no problem with disagreeing on sports teams, we end up rooting for the other's team as long as they aren't playing each other, but Kherington can't grow up liking and rooting for two teams. We can't cause her that much confusion at such a young age, if she is confused about her favorite team, whose to say she won't be confused about other things in life, and I am NOT having that!

She will definitely be a St. Louis Cardinals fan because Ashley didn't even like baseball until we went to a couple of Cardinals games last year, and now she is a fan. I already bought her a "Mommy's future Cardinals fan" t-shirt. I tried to buy a couple Redskins and Duke one's as well but she told me it would be a waste of money because she wouldn't wear them. How unfair is that? It is my baby too!

So Ashley and I will need to make an agreement with the other two sports. Of course I am sure my reader's are saying, "Just let Kherington decide." my answer to that is, "Hell NO!" Kids like winners, and if we give Kherington the decision to choose who she wants instead of raising her towards a certain team, she is going to end up liking whoever wins the Super Bowl and NCAA Tournament the year she can first remember. For example this year she would be either a Green Bay Packers or Pittsburgh Steelers fan. I can't live with my child constantly wearing green and yellow or black and gold, and God for bid the Dallas Cowboys win the Super Bowl in a couple of years because she will have to be put up for adoption then! The same goes for college basketball, this year Connecticut and Butler made it to the championship, no and no. And again, God for bid the North Carolina Tar Heels make it to the championship because she would again be put up for adoption. Which she probably will end up liking them anyways because she is a girl and they have a girly color, baby blue, so she will think it's pretty and will ask for a UNC t-shirt one Christmas and she won't get anything but a bag of coal and I will tell her Santa Clause doesn't like UNC and she will never get presents from him again if she continues to like them.

Tip #24: If your biggest worry about your child growing up is who her favorite sports team will be, then you got it good!

And this is when I started to worry about what city I was flying over on my journey to, destination... dad.

The Wedding: May 20th, 2011

When I had asked Ashley to marry me "The Deed" was done but "The Test" wasn't. I kept telling Ashley I wasn't going to propose to her until after I got my tax money back because I didn't have the money to buy her an engagement ring. It was just my way of making sure she was not expecting a ring anytime soon, so that way when I did propose to her it was like an 18-wheeler hit her while walking through Walmart, completely unexpected! (Although with all the pictures of people in Walmarts on the internet nothing would be unexpected there) But when we had talked about trying for a baby she had said she didn't want people to think that the only reason I asked her to marry me was because we were going to have a baby together. I told her people wouldn't and even if they did who cares because her and I both know that isn't the real reason.

So then after "The Test" took place Ashley and I discussed the wedding date. I wanted to get married within a year because I didn't want to be that guy who looks like he doesn't want to commit but because his girlfriend was complaining about not having a ring he proposed and is engaged for three years. So Ashley and I contemplated dates when I finally said March 3rd, 2012. I picked this date because it's cool to say, 3/3/12. A cool and fun date to say means it will be a cool and fun date to remember, already planning ahead.

Ashley had a problem with the wedding date at first since it only gave her five months t0 lose the baby pounds. But I told her she could do it and pumped her up with motivation, I also used the people from The Biggest Loser as examples, telling her if they can do it she can do it. She believed in herself and what I was telling her and the wedding was on. She went through a month of looking at nothing but wedding websites and kept asking my opinion about different things for the wedding.

Then I think it finally set in, she was starting to feel like Precious (she is going to kill me) and realized that five months would be way to difficult, it wasn't enough time. So after much deliberation, meaning her telling me we weren't getting married in March of '12, we decided on a different date for good reasons. We decided to get married on October 13, 2012. As I said before in "The Announcement" Ashley's nephew was born on December 10th. And throughout my entire sports career I have always worn the number 13. So our wedding date has my sports number and the birthday of Ashley's nephew in it, 10/13/12.

Tip #20: Don't tell her she looks like Precious and give her all the time she needs to lose the baby pounds.

And this is when I realized that my expedition starts October 3rd, 2011 after the completion of my journey to, destination... dad.

The Sex: April 30th, 2011

This is the day! I never thought I would be this excited about a day that wasn't Opening Day or Selection Sunday or the Superbowl or any day that involves sports for that matter. But this day surpassed any of those, and I never knew that was possible. Sports have and I thought always would be my life, sorry Ashley, but today I realized that there is now someone coming that will be more important than any buzzer beater or walk-off home run.

So as you can see I had been waiting for this day ever since the last OBGYN visit. Well lets just say the nurse wasn't exactly game show host material. This is a huge day for us and she knows that. What parents walk in and say in a monotone voice, "I can't wait to find out what we are having." Everyone is excited about this moment, even the dead beat dad whose only worry is that he has to have sex with the same women for the rest of his life, he still cares if it is a boy or girl. Or the sixteen year old boy who didn't pay attention in sex ed and didn't know how to put a condom on so because he didn't want to look stupid he skipped that part of fore play and now just threw away his dream of becoming a professional ball player, he still cares if it a boy or girl. Even the mom who is a surrogate mother cares! So when the nurse says, "OK, let's find out what you are having." and then in the most boring way possible says, "It's a girl." Really? That's what all this excitement was for? For you to give me the biggest news of my life in a response that I get from a waiter when I ask whether they have Pepsi or Coke products? So this got me thinking, what would it sound like if the guy from The Price is Right announced to you what you are having.

"You are having... a baby girl! Say goodbye to those eight hours of sleep nights because this girl comes with a full operating digestive system that will have you changing diapers in your sleep. She also comes with lungs that could cry for hours and will alert you whenever she is hungry. And in a couple of years be ready to go out in public with her while she is wearing a pink princess dress, because when you try to take it off, she will cry until you put it back on. Wait there's more, because in 16 years you will be looking into buying a shotgun and telling your wife it's your new hobby, even though you will never fire it. But you will be cleaning it whenever your daughter's date comes by to pick her up. But that's not all, in another 10 years you will have a head full of gray hair while having to walk her down the aisle and give up the most important girl in your life. Congratulations!"

That is the kind of OBGYN office I want to go too! Our OBGYN shows us three lines on the ultrasound and tells us that it's a girl, so I ask, "What do the three lines mean?" She paused for a moment and then said, "They are the lady parts." She acted as if I was being perverted and was going to laugh like a stoned hippie if she would have said the words vagina or clitoris. (Ashley told me what the three lines were after we left.) I didn't know what I was looking at on the ultrasound, ever. She showed us her face, and it was so weird looking that the only thing I could think of was the scene from Species where the alien rips through the girl's stomach. So no, I didn't know what the three lines were, but I do now, thanks to the Hitler of OBGYNs.

Tip #17: Don't ask questions at the OBGYN office, it will be assumed that you are a pervert.

And this is when I found out who would be waiting for me at the gate when I land from my journey to, destination... dad.

The Agreement: December 16th, 2010

When Ashley and I decided to try for a baby I had some stipulations she had to agree with before I would agree. I am a huge sports fan and played many sports while growing up, so of course I want a son. I think that is every heterosexual man’s wish when trying for a baby. I never made it to the professional level in any sport, hell I didn’t even make it to the college level, but hopefully my son can make it further than I did in whatever sport he decides as long as it doesn’t involve wearing a leotard or figure skates. But on the other hand I want a girl because I helped raise my niece and I know exactly what I am doing when it comes to a girl. So in a nutshell, I want one of each. So I told Ashley that after we have two kids, if they are the same gender then we will have a third. She was hesitant at first but then she agreed. She might have just agreed to it so I would agree to trying for a baby when she is really thinking, “This dumbass doesn’t know that I have control as to whether we have a kid or not.

Tip #1: If she wants to have a baby and you are telling her now is not the right time, but eventually you do decide you want one, and there is something you want. Use this agreement to try for a baby as the bargaining chip. I used it for something far down the road that I want to make sure happens, but you could use it for the new Madden game coming out if you want.

And this is when I planned to set off on my journey to, destination… dad.